The Hardest Lesson I’ve Learned in the Ministry
The hardest lesson I’ve learned in the ministry is that you just cannot help some people. We want to be able to help everyone and see everyone get healed and walk in the fullness that Jesus has provided, but it’s not going to happen. It’s unrealistic to think that it will, and if you do, you’ll just set yourself up for disappointment and needlessly kick yourself.
JESUS could not help everyone! He COULD NOT do any mighty miracles at Nazareth because of their unbelief (Mark 6:1-6). Surely He knew that He was going to pay a price so that they could all be healed, and He wanted them all healed. But they weren’t. The power of the Lord was present to heal the religious leaders at one house, but only one man who was let down through the roof was healed (Luke 5:17-26). It wasn’t a power issue – those religious leaders just weren’t going to get with the program.
Jesus told His disciples that there would be some who believe and some who do not believe, and that those who believe will be saved and those who don’t will be damned (Mark 16:15-16). You’re not going to have universal success with everyone you minister to!
We see this played out in the book of Acts. Some believed and some disbelieved (Acts 28:23-24). Even the apostles with their mighty anointings were not able to get everyone saved and set free. Neither will you.
Some people just won’t get out of their own way. You try and try to help them, you feed them, you clothe them, you try to teach them life skills, you pray with them, and yet just as they start to seem to be making progress, they shoot themselves in the foot again and end up back where they were before you started trying to help them. Often the people you try to help the most end up like that; they want YOU to do all the work and all the believing, and they balk when you insist that they start taking some responsibility. It is the experience of many pastors (including my experience pastoring) that many people whom you try to help the most end up being the first to stab you in the back when they don’t get what they want from you. Still, we keep trying to help other people even when some people aren’t “helpable.” We don’t keep banging our heads against the wall though; there comes a point where enough is enough and people either want to grow up or they don’t. Some people just have to be allowed to “be ignorant” (1 Corinthians 14:38). Our time is better spent making disciples – reproducing ourselves among people who are open to growing in the Lord, which not everyone is.
Some people will not receive healing regardless of what you do. Some don’t want to lose their disability checks (YES, there are such people) and some don’t like their lives much anyway, so they’re willing to commit Satan-assisted suicide by not fighting a disease that is killing them. Others just wouldn’t have anything to complain about or a way to make sure that other people always had to pay attention to them. Others are so steeped in the traditions of men that they just “know” God put that sickness on them for a reason, though if you press them, they won’t be able to tell you what that reason is! Some are just unwilling to put forth any effort to learn Scriptures or attend church services or special meetings where Jesus is healing the sick through His Body.
The fact that some do not receive healing when you try to minister to them does NOT mean that you are a failure! Jesus, Peter, Paul, Philip, Stephen and others were not failures just because they couldn’t get everyone into the Kingdom of God.
There were plenty of cases where God sent prophets in the Old Testament, only to have them ignored or ridiculed or killed. They were not failures just because the people did not receive them or their message! They tried to help the people, but certain people just didn’t want God’s help or counsel.
We can’t get callous and stop trying to help people just because some people are lazy or won’t let you help them. We just have to make sure that we have realistic expectations and realize when it’s time to move on to better spend our time elsewhere. Jesus did not just keep preaching and preaching at Nazareth thinking that He had to get them healed before He could move on to His next assignment. If you try to put a burden on yourself (or have another preacher put it on you) that it is now YOUR responsibility to make sure that certain people are healed (“Don’t come back until they’re healed!”), you are just setting yourself up for discouragement. Jesus NEVER told His disciples, “Heal the sick in every town, and don’t come back until they’re all healed!” To the contrary, He gave instructions on what to do when a city did not receive them – shake the dust off their feet and move on (Luke 10:10-11 and elsewhere)! The apostles had to move on in cases where cities started siding against them and wanting to kill them. Not everyone will love you and your good news about the healing Jesus purchased! Get over it. You’re not a failure in God’s eyes if some people reject the message – you are a success because you OFFERED the words of life even if the people rejected them. If God doesn’t consider you a failure, neither should you.